Thursday, April 18, 2019

Uni stresses

It's no secret that right now I am stressed. I have a performance exam in 3 weeks, a play to finish writing as well as a long-ass essay. As 2nd year finally comes to an end, I can honestly say that I'm not sad to see it go. Don't get me wrong, I have enjoyed this year -but it's just been different.
When I started Uni, I had this perfect dream in my head of becoming an actress. I left 6th form loving everything to do with acting and knew 100% that was what I wanted to do. 

Now I'm not too sure.

I always imagined that Uni would just expand my passion and give me the tools to actually achieve the dream which I so carefully planned. But after 2 years, I feel like that passion has just shrunk in size. I still enjoy acting, don't get me wrong, but it's not as fun anymore. I don't get the rush of excitement like I used to. 
Luckily, however, my mind has wandered onto other things. I'm really loving writing at the moment -something which fizzled out when I was younger. I love the idea of writing something which could change the way someone sees something, or bring to life something which isn't even thought about. I also have an interesting in teaching- which is something I never thought I'd say. I still love everything to do with the theatre and the way it works, the ideas and practitioners which go behind -so what better than to teach and talk about it every day. Just because I don't want to act anymore doesn't mean I want to cut ties with the theatre world entirely. 

So as 2nd year ends a new year of adventures begin, which eventually leads to being out in the big wide world. Am I allowed to say that I'm scared? Because I really, really am. As someone who follows lists and plans religiously, the fact that I don't have a solid plan for my future is freaking me out! I'm even thinking of having a year out to travel because I'm so lost. Who knows, maybe I could 'find myself' halfway across the globe.

Sorry for the ramble, I just had to get my thoughts down somewhere.
If you have any words of wisdom please let me know 

Hollie xx


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Friday, April 12, 2019

Welcome

I've been on the blogging scene for quite a while now- 7 years to be exact. And in that time I have worked my way through many many blogs. Each one I created wasn't quite right, either I pretended I was someone completely different to who I really am- in order to fit with the trends (we've all been a beauty blogger at one stage or another). Or I wrote about things I didn't really find interesting just so I could stick to a 'theme'.

There's an illusion you see. The idea that a blog must have a theme to be successful and interesting. For instance, if my blog was mainly about travel, then heaven forbid I write about food. 
I tried to stick to this rule again and again,  however, I just got bored. There's only so many posts you can write about travelling if you're a 15-year-old working on £5.50 an hour -unless trips to the park and local woods count. But, now a 20-year-old year, I can happily say that my life has progressed a little bit. I'm at university in a completely different city, I have my own flat, I have a much better paying job and I actually do have a few adventures planned (that don't include a park or woods). 

That being said, I'm under a new impression that a blog doesn't have to be so solid in structure to be entertaining and interesting. I was reading 'What Olivia Did' and loved the way her blog jumped from topic to topic. One minute it's her life, the next a trip away, then a recipe, topped with style and beauty. 
I always imagined my blog being something like that when I was younger -giving myself the opportunity to write about whatever I wanted, and actually enjoying what was being written.

So, I welcome you, wonderful reader who has gotten through all my ramblings, to my last and final blog.

Hollie Leaf.

(Whoo).

I solemnly swear to write only posts that I enjoy and to not stick to a specific theme because it's some unspoken blogging rule. 
I promise to be myself and only that.
Love it or leave it.

Thank you for reading my first post of many and hope to see you again,

Hollie xx


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