Uni stresses

It's no secret that right now I am stressed. I have a performance exam in 3 weeks, a play to finish writing as well as a long-ass essay. As 2nd year finally comes to an end, I can honestly say that I'm not sad to see it go. Don't get me wrong, I have enjoyed this year -but it's just been different.

When I started Uni, I had this perfect dream in my head of becoming an actress. I left 6th form loving everything to do with acting and knew 100% that was what I wanted to do. 

Now I'm not too sure.

I always imagined that Uni would just expand my passion and give me the tools to actually achieve the dream which I so carefully planned. But after 2 years, I feel like that passion has just shrunk in size. I still enjoy acting, don't get me wrong, but it's not as fun anymore. I don't get the rush of excitement like I used to. 

Luckily, however, my mind has wandered onto other things. I'm really loving writing at the moment -something which fizzled out when I was younger. I love the idea of writing something which could change the way someone sees something, or bring to life something which isn't even thought about. I also have an interesting in teaching- which is something I never thought I'd say. I still love everything to do with the theatre and the way it works, the ideas and practitioners which go behind -so what better than to teach and talk about it every day. Just because I don't want to act anymore doesn't mean I want to cut ties with the theatre world entirely. 

So as 2nd year ends a new year of adventures begin, which eventually leads to being out in the big wide world. Am I allowed to say that I'm scared? Because I really, really am. As someone who follows lists and plans religiously, the fact that I don't have a solid plan for my future is freaking me out! I'm even thinking of having a year out to travel because I'm so lost. Who knows, maybe I could 'find myself' halfway across the globe.

Sorry for the ramble, I just had to get my thoughts down somewhere.

If you have any words of wisdom please let me know 

Hollie xx